The Fears of Studying Abroad

Terrified about studying abroad? I’ve been there. You’re excited, terrified, anxious, and about every possible emotion you could be having – you are. Studying abroad is terrifying, but I can promise you, it will be the best thing you’ve ever done.

For any of you out there who are a total home-body, and hate being outside your comfort zone, but want to study abroad and don’t know how you’ll possibly do it – you’ve come to the right place. That was me three years ago when I finally decided to send that $500 deposit in to apply for the program and was seriously wondering if I was absolutely insane.

My whole life, I have struggled with being a total home-body. I wouldn’t go to sleepovers as a young kid, and if I did, I likely cried through the whole thing. Eventually, sleepovers got easier for me (way later in life than the average Joe), but hey, better late than never. However, the thought of leaving home (never mind the country!) for six months was a completely daunting thought. How in the world was I supposed to do that?!

It took a lot of self convincing and chatting with my family and friends to help me realize that this is really something that I want to do, and the best things in life truly are never easy. To be completely honest with you, I tried not to think about it. I went through the motions of completing the 47,756,385 packets of paperwork that it takes to study abroad, and kept telling myself I was doing the right thing.

When it actually came time to leave my parents at the airport, can you say “sob-fest”?! I mean really, it was bad. I’ve never cried so uncontrollably in my life…embarrassing to say the least in such a crowded area. However, my new friend Jordan showed up who I was studying abroad with and I tried to pull myself together so he wouldn’t be like “is this girl gonna be crying for the next six months orrrrrr….?”

So, the final hugs were given as I pulled out my 378th tissue of the day, and walked my way through security. I did not turn around to wave one last goodbye (probably because I ran out of tissues and didn’t want to risk it), and got to the other side of security – part one of the journey. As I got to the other side, I felt this massive weight be lifted off of me. I was totally fine, felt good about what I was doing, and had finally stopped crying (you’re welcome, Jordan).

As our plane took off, I had my French jazz playing through my headphones as I waited for my first legal glass (*plastic cup*) of wine. I wrote my first journal entry for the semester about everything I was feeling – fears, excitement, giddiness, etc. My journey had begun, and I knew I was going to be OK.

*This is a photo of Jordan and I on our layover in London, waiting for our flight to Paris* (Please notice the giant tired bags under my eyes…a mixture of crying and lack of sleep created this beautiful photo)